the end of the tale of how arin went blind trying to crochet

no, really.

i’ve DONE IT.

i have made…

well, basically, i have made the world’s best crocheted marble EVER.

it all started because i want to crochet a beaded necklace, but, with the pattern calling for a .75mm steel crochet hook and SEWING THREAD, i first had to create it at a scale i could actually see and get an idea of how the pattern worked. so first step? ~done~.

next step, adjust to TEENY TINY thread and hook… and because i’ve no idea what “top-stitching thread” is, i decided to go with a size 80 dmc thread, as it felt a bit thicker than regular sewing thread. (and if nothing else, i could almost see it!). …AND because i can’t actually see the hook on the .75mm steel crochet hook, i went with a 1.30mm steel hook. after all, this was just a test – a way to get used to working at this scale.

so i made the first chain 6, EASY PEASY! …then i tried a slip stitch to make a loop. and dropped the stitch. 563 times. (yes, i counted. no, i never exaggerate EVER.) but, FINALLY, i got the slip stitch made. woohoo! i was on my way!!

…and 798.6 gabillion attempts later, i had my 8 single crochets around the loop. or so i thought. since i couldn’t actually be sure of what i was counting. me: “1,2,3,… did i count that stitch or the one next to… wait. 1,2,3… is that a stitch or am i cross-eyed?”

(let me say right here… if you don’t have an ott light? *buy one*. (especially if you’re working at a scale that only micro-organisms can see.) i happened to catch one on sale just as i began this project and it’s been an eye-saver.)

by the 5th round, i realized… i’d made a bit of a mistake in selecting a multi-coloured thread (pattern calls for 4 different coloured threads to be switched out each round, but i hate switching yarns that often, so i was *cheating*.). at this scale, it’s harder to keep track of the rounds, but i wasn’t about to stop there. I COULD DO THIS!!! just be patient. pay attention. count stitches. i kept going…

this is what ~perseverance~ looks like – slightly blurry and out of focus.

of course, the first thing i did after my little pep talk? i made a HUGE error, which i wouldn’t discover for several more rows; but since this was just a “test” to get used to the thread and hook, i ~allowed~ myself to adjust and fudge until i could get back to the correct count and spacing. (“correct count.” HA. HAHA. HAHAHAHA. i say that so easily now! i’m not even sobbing! try this: cross your eyes and count grains of salt. it was *totally* just like that.)

now, i never expected the gauge to come out correctly – i was unsure of the thread size, i was using a larger hook, and my tension was anything but consistent. (nevermind the HUGE error. no, really, JUST NEVERMIND.) so colour me surprised when at the point in the pattern which calls for the bead to be inserted? …it was looking like i might be able to actually use the right sized bead! …which i hadn’t bought. …because i never expected this test to work. …and it was midnight. …and there were no stores open. and i wasn’t prepared to go to jail for breaking into a craft store because “OMG, IT WAS AN EMERGENCY, I NEEDED ONE WOODEN BEAD, OFFICER!!!”

but see. i’m a ~crafter~. i have ~supplies~. and by “supplies”, i mean, “stuff i’ve no idea what i’m ever going to do with, but can’t get rid of it yet” …which just happened to include ONE 3/4 INCH WOODEN… BALL.

still unsure whether or not the rounds would cover the ball completely, i decided to give it a try and see how it’d come out…

i give you… my crocheted wooden… marble. ball. not a bead. totally useless. thingy:

DAMN SKIPPY! we haz a crocheted wooden… marble!

it came out much better than i expected and i’m pretty sure that i can get by with the size 80 thread AND the 1.30mm steel crochet hook… as long as i get my tension more consistent. also? better vision insurance. but in the end, i WILL have my beaded necklace 🙂

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